Indeed, it was.
But it still burns in my mind
He knew what I was anticipating all these years
I knew he had his promise
I knew my wish wasn't going to fulfill fully based on what I meant for
He said he already accomplished my anticipation
But deep in my heart, I kept silence
I am very happy that he tried to overcome his fear just to satisfy my ask.
But why am I not feeling overjoyed ?
I knew he always tried his best to make me happy
He is a great husband yet a great father
I can't do what he did for me
Why I am feeling all these numbness to surrounding?
It is quite uneasy to find myself not feeling happy. ALWAYS.
No one did me wrong
Am I mentally or psychologically having any difficulties?
What happened to me?
I feel suffocated I feel lonely
I feel weird
I am feeling myself too strange
People want to help
I can't understand my need
I know my family loves me
I know they need me
But I don't even feel I need anyone
I feel bad always for nothing.
I am tired to feel.
Why?
It has been too long
Why am I struggling?
For what?
I feel comfortable to not to feel anyone's feeling
But I feel bad to have this thought.
I know it doesn't matter.
It is fine to be easy.
I never want to admit that I am selfish but yes, I know I can't be selflessness.
Great. Accept who I am. It is okay.
It is okay. Mind my mind before others.
💪
